gryff_of_grace

08:38 pm: Girl's Disease
Title: Girl's Disease
Pairing: Skandar Keynes/Georgie Henley [well, kind of]
Rating: PG
Summary: If there's one thing that Skandar hates, it's girls. Written for & inspired by narnialovers. :)
Disclaimer: This fic involves real people! If you are bothered by this, please don't read. Obviously I don't own these people (though sometimes I wish I owned William). I also don't know them in RL (most a pity) and this is just for fun. Hee.
A/N: My first RPF, which I still can't believe I wrote, btw. It's written in a weird, fun, kind of style. I hope you guys like it!!

It was a well known fact that Skandar Keynes hated girls. He hated these girls, ladies, women, females - whatever word you would like to use - no matter their age or size.

He was the boy who scrunched up his face in disgust when his mother kissed him and who let out a scandalized cry whenever his great aunt pinched his cheeks. He scowled whenever he saw teenaged girls (because he especially hated these types of females), and shook his head sadly at the small ones, knowing that one day those poor children would eventually turn into the aforementioned teenaged girls one day.

Oh, he just couldn't stand them! Their voices were high pitched, they giggled all the time, and they were just plain annoying. He didn't like that they smelled of perfumes or wore horrid amounts of make up on their faces or that they cried during movies. He didn't like that they ate their food daintily, afraid that it would get stuck between their teeth. He didn't like that all they were concerned about was dieting and fashion and older boys who owned a car.

On top of being annoying, females were extremely confusing. Skandar had no idea why they traveled in groups to use the loo (couldn't they go alone?) or why the world seemed to end if their hair mussed up a bit (surely they could just brush it again?).

When Skandar was cast as Edmund Pevensie in a film based on C.S. Lewis' Narnia books, he was less than pleased to learn that he had three main female co-stars.

Tilda Swinton was a nice woman, sure, but when she started asking him questions like, "What's your favorite subject in school?" and giving him compliments such as, "Oh, my, don't you look handsome today!" it was all Skandar could do not to run as far away from her as he could.

Similarly, when Anna Popplewell arrived on set one day and remarked that Skandar's shoes didn't match his shirt, he was shocked into silence for a full ten minutes.

He tried talking to his male co-stars about these things, but they didn't help him at all. Indeed, William was all ready friends with Anna and both he and James were in awe of Tilda.

And both had warmed instantly to the cute-as-a-button Georgie Henley.

Georgie was the worst of the three, even though she didn't talk to him much or comment on his clothing. She merely attacked him when he was least expecting it. She would appear out of nowhere, throw her arms around his waist, and rest her head on his chest.

This was something that Skandar truly despised. In fact, hugs upset him more about females than anything else - WHY did they have to do it? Would they keel over if they didn't reach a certain count of hugs per day?

So Skandar had taken to avoiding Georgie even more then Tilda and Anna. He would duck behind the director and hide behind couches whenever Georgie entered a room, trying to ignore the hopeful look in her eyes as she searched around for him. Of course, sometimes Georgie would spot him (horror of horrors this was) and thus would begin a chase, Skandar running because his life depended on it and little Georgie attempting to keep up with him.

After one particular chase that had ended with Skandar tripping over a camera leg and thoroughly destroying it, Andrew Adamson, their director, had forbid running on the set.

Skandar had been quite grumpy for the rest of the day, as Andrew had all ready forbid him from drinking Coca-Cola on set. That Andrew sure liked putting restrictions on him.

"Will, how do you deal with it?" Skandar asked his movie brother one day, as Anna and Georgie filmed a scene.

"Deal with what?" said Will.

"Women, girls, the whole female species!" exclaimed Skandar.

Will shrugged and gave an impish grin. "I quite like women."

Skandar raised his eyebrows. "Why? You don't find them annoying? Or...confusing?"

Will shrugged again. "Of course they're annoying and confusing - that's what's so great about them!" He glanced quickly at Anna as he said this, which did not go unnoticed by Skandar.

Skandar blinked and wondered briefly if all that tea Will drank was finally catching up with him. He was bleeding mad!

Trying to refocus his friend's attention to the matter at hand (instead of Anna, who was crying wonderfully for the camera), Skandar pointed to the book in Will's hands. "What are you reading?" he asked.

"To Kill a Mockingbird," Will replied, with such a sparkle in his eyes Skandar reasoned it must be a really, really good book. Though, honestly, he didn't think anyone should be reading books about killing birds. Skandar opened his mouth to say this, but Will interrupted him, saying proudly, "Anna and I are reading it together." A blush spread across his cheeks.

This, obviously, sent poor Skandar over the edge. Will was supposed to be his friend, he wasn't allowed to go around reading books with girls! Skandar gave the older boy a look of betrayal, then stalked out of the room.

He was haunted by nightmares that night. Images of girls (his grandmother, his on set tutor, the giggling female make up artists) spun around in his head, followed by Will staring lovingly into Anna's eyes saying, "I quite like women." Then Andrew appeared in his dream, laughing, "You cannot have Cola! Instead, you must have hugs! HUGS!" and Georgie's face appeared, smiling and triumphant, as she held her arms oustretched.

Skandar woke up crying for his mother, which was actually quite ironic, considering his hate for all females.

It was only on the last day of filming for The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe that it dawned on Skandar that he was now completely comfortable (well, almost completely comfortable) around his female co-stars.

Tilda really wasn't that annoying, he had to admit. She was a great actress, and she was very funny, which he appreciated. Anna, he found, was a good listener and talking with her always eased his mind. She also took care not to talk about fashion around him; instead, she and Will would sneak away from everyone else and discuss the devilish topic. At least, that's what they told people they were doing.

Georgie had stopped giving Skandar hugs, and since this had been his only problem with her, he quite liked her the best out of everyone.

Her voice wasn't high pitched, but soft and childlike. She didn't giggle, but actually laughed, loudly and quite undignified. She didn't wear perfume or make up and she didn't cry during movies. She didn't eat slowly at all, but ate her food with gusto, not caring if any of it got stuck between her teeth. And Georgie wasn't concerned in the least with fashion or boys or her hair.

As Skandar watched her talk with James McAvoy, he knew that he would miss her greatly.

Georgie must have noticed that he was staring at her, for she broke away from James and skipped over to him, a wide smile on her face. "I have a present for you!" she said happily and Skandar couldn't stop himself from looking a bit wary. The last time she had approached him like that, she had launched herself into his arms, and he had toppled over magnificently, hitting his head on the ground.

Georgie laughed at his expression.

"What did you get me?" said Skandar, curiously looking down at her. His mouth opened in shock when she pulled from behind her a two liter bottle of Coca-Cola.

"Andrew said you could have cola now," she said, "so I bought it for you!"

Skandar took the bottle from her hands, speechless.

Georgie smiled knowingly at him and walked away.

And then, Skandar was seized with a most peculiar feeling. "Georgie!" he called, and he had yelled her name so loudly that everyone - cast, crew, and family members - looked at him.

Georgie turned around. "Yes?"

He grinned and took a few steps toward her, bent down, and to everyone's surprise, gave her a hug.

And standing there, hugging Georgie Henley, Skandar Keynes realized that he didn't hate girls, ladies, women - heck, females - anymore.

Tags: fandom: chronicles of narnia, general, humor, rating: pg, rpf, skandar/georgie